Gods plan or my plan?

I like to be in control.

Fact.

Despite being a very relaxed lad with an easy going nature and a flexibility,  I like to be in control of the direction things are going in. I’m not massively religious about time or how things are going to be done, just as long as they get done. I always leave essays to the last minute because I know that it will get done no matter how late I leave it (I’ve never missed a deadline). Everyday as I wake up I envisage what things I will aim achieve that day and become annoyed when they don’t go to plan. Its the same for my life. I have a big plan and it would be as follows… Finish my degree in sports coaching, do a PGCE, get married, live in Africa with my wife for 1-2 years and then come back to England and fight for this country for Gods kingdom alongside my partner with Christ directing us.

It sounds great and Godly.

Yet recently I’ve grown to realise the fact that most of my plans never seem to go the way I intend them. I wouldn’t have ever predicted being at winchester university two years ago and even in the every day my days never quite shape out as I would imagine them to. Of course some of these are God given dreams and I have a number of dreams that I embark on and believe are from God yet I’m impatient. I try and speed up the plan by doing God’s work for him.

Yet God calls us to follow him, not the other way around. How often do I decide to do what I think I should I do or what seems the most Godly rather than actually following God. It seems crazy but I just fall into the habit of asking God to bless my plans and not begin to think what God is thinking. I’m amazed by passage in Mark where Jesus calls his first disciples. We so often forget that the disciples had no idea where they were going or what this journey would lead them to because we have the whole picture.

Passing alongside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and Andrew the brother of Simon casting a net into the sea, for they were fishermen. And Jesus said to them, “Follow me, and I will make you become fishers of men.”  And immediately they left their nets and followed him. (Mark 1:16-19)

The thing that challenges me about this is that the disciples were completely relying on Jesus to lead them where they were going. I wonder what it must have been like to wake up and not know where you were going. Excited, nervous, scared?

Are we going to go the way we think is right and us God to bless it? Or  are we seeking God and following where he goes like the disciples?

I think in our culture and for me particularly we like to embark down the safe road of being in control of where we are going,  trying to live out for Jesus as we go. Yet isn’t the radical call of the gospel to humble ourselves and FOLLOW Christ. Jesus said I only do what I see my father in heaven doing (John 5:19)…

Its a hard road to go because we can’t see the end, its almost asking question do I trust God enough to lead me one step at a time and to lead me through the darkness so that that I may grow into the man God wants me to be. In a culture where we are addicted to security its a hard choice taking away the security of seeing the whole path laid out before us. Following Gods plans is hard, it led the disciples on a route where they often had no idea whats going on, it took the Israelites on a 40 year journey to the promised land, it led Joshua to march around a city silently, it led Daniel to the lions den, it led Phillip to an Ehtiopian Eunuch it led Paul to prison and it to Abraham from his own lands. Yet they trusted and every time God pulled them through and did amazing things through them.

The more I experience being led by God the more I realise he doesn’t tend to do what I think he should do. I’m pretty sure Joshua’s top ten battle tactics for Jericho would not include marching around the city blowing trumpets…

There have been disappointments and times of sorrow in my life where things I’ve planned or thought were going to happen haven’t actually happened and yet sometimes thats the journey God wants us to take because he teaches us something new.

Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; ⁴ perseverance, character; and character, hope. ⁵ And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. (Romans 5:4-5)

Yet also we forget that the reason these people allowed God to lead them and they trusted was because of who God is. Its not some punt in the dark its follow our very maker and Father.

Psalm 27

English Standard Version (ESV)

The Lord Is My Light and My Salvation

Of David.

1 The Lord is my light and my salvation;
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life;
of whom shall I be afraid?

² When evildoers assail me
to eat up my flesh,
my adversaries and foes,
it is they who stumble and fall.

³ Though an army encamp against me,
my heart shall not fear;
though war arise against me,
yet I will be confident.

⁴ One thing have I asked of the Lord,
that will I seek after:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord
and to inquire in his temple.

⁵ For he will hide me in his shelter
in the day of trouble;
he will conceal me under the cover of his tent;
he will lift me high upon a rock.

⁶ And now my head shall be lifted up
above my enemies all around me,
and I will offer in his tent
sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make melody to the Lord.

⁷ Hear, O Lord, when I cry aloud;
be gracious to me and answer me!
⁸ You have said, “Seek my face.”
My heart says to you,
“Your face, Lord, do I seek.”
⁹      Hide not your face from me.
Turn not your servant away in anger,
O you who have been my help.
Cast me not off; forsake me not,
O God of my salvation!
¹⁰ For my father and my mother have forsaken me,
but the Lord will take me in.

¹¹ Teach me your way, O Lord,
and lead me on a level path
because of my enemies.
¹² Give me not up to the will of my adversaries;
for false witnesses have risen against me,
and they breathe out violence.

¹³ I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living!
¹⁴ Wait for the Lord;
be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the Lord!

The ultimate question is to ask ourselves do we trust God enough to follow him wherever he calls us, not just the big plan but the daily plan. How I long to wake up everyday feeling like one of the twelve, not knowing where the journey was going to take us next but knowing I was in the hands of the miracle maker, preparing for the days adventure

Are we letting God direct us everyday? Are we letting go of our plans knowing that the journey God takes us on is one of love because it is being led by love itself? What plans are we holding to?

All we can do is be obedient to God in the everyday as we seek him with all we have and fix our eyes on him, the king of kings.